THANK YOU VEY MUCH FOR BEING
"THIS MORNING'S FARMER".

WITH A SELF-PENNED SONG
ENTITLED "I LOVED YOU, BUT YOU LEFT ME".

YOU AND I BOTH KNOW THAT DEAD AIR IS A CRIME.

DON'T WORRY.
IT'S JUST A CUSHION THAT SIMULATES RECTAL GAS.

I ADMIRE YOU TEACHERS. YOU'RE VERY HEROIC
TO DO WHAT YOU DO FOR SUCH RUBBISH MONEY.

I PREFER DAVID ATTENBOROUGH.
HE'S MORE HONEST. HE INTERVIEWS REAL MICE.

THAT WAS NORWICH-BASED SINGER
CHRISTIAN LE VAUX

# TAKE A PINCH OF WHITE MAN #

OK, RIGHT. ALAN ATTACK! LIKE THE "COOK REPORT"

- YOU'VE NOT GOT A...
- ELECTRIC BUZZER? NO.

AND THAT CUSHION EFFECT ON THE FACE.

CABBAGES. DON'T LIKE CABBAGES AT ALL.
LET'S GET THROUGH THIS LOT.

DAN!

HOW DID THE COUNTY SHOW GO, ALAN?

I'LL TELL YOU AN ANECDOTE!

THAT ONLY APPLIES TO ARCHERS AND JEFFREY ARCHER,

- WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN UP TO?
- TRIED TO OUT-DANCE A COMPUTER. IMPOSSIBLE.

DO YOU FANCY A CUP
OF DELICIOUS MICROWAVEABLE SOUP?