DONALD FROM HEMSBY HAS E-MAILED US TO SAY,

ALAN'S DEEP BATH,

SINCE THE '80S.

ALAN PARTRIDGE TIE AND BLAZER BADGE
AND WAGON WHEELS. EXCELLENT.

OK. LET'S RECAP. DRAW THE GUN FROM THE HOLSTER,

(DALEK VOICE) E-MAIL OF THE EVENING!

(ALAN) THAT IS THE BEST VALENTINE'S DAY
I'VE HAD IN EIGHT YEARS.

- HE WAS GETTING THE AERIAL.
- I KNOW. I WAS BEING RHETORICAL.

JUST GIVE THAT A QUICK CLEAN.

WHERE DO YOU LIVE, BILL? WHAT'S YOUR ADDRESS?

IF WE SET IT UP NOW,
THEN MICHAEL CAN PRESS THE BUTTON TO LET YOU GO.

(LYNN) OH, IT'S SMELLY.
(ALAN) IT'S GOT WALNUTS IN.

YEAH. I LIKE ALL THE BANDS.

LYNN, THIS IS TERRIBLE. THIS IS TERRIBLE.

BECAUSE YOU HAVEN'T BOUNCED BACK.
NOT EMOTIONALLY AND NOT IN A CAREER WAY EITHER.

I'LL JUST BE A MINUTE.

SORRY. MUSIC.
HIDE THE STEAK, IT'S CHRISSIE HYNDE.

I'D LOVE TO FLY A HELICOPTER.
THE WORLD'S GETTING SMALLER.